Three
by theglamourfades
Summary: But now, neither of them could stop from smiling, walking through each room of the cottage with their son. Their dearest wish and their greatest gift. (S6 CS spoilers)


**A/N: This is my first fic of 2016, so if it's not too late to say it, Happy New Year! (and now that phrase will give me eternal feels...) Of course it had to be about a certain subject ;)**

 **Even now it's over, I don't get to own Downton Abbey.**

* * *

For a moment or two – for much longer than that – it didn't seem real.

This very vision had come to him in his dreams, recurring almost nightly in the last month or so. Each time it was wondrous, but never quite perfect. There was always a problem or puzzlement. Some important item had been forgotten – in one instance, he had not been wearing any shoes or socks – the walk took longer; the paths led in entirely different directions. A few times the cottage had vanished from where it should have stood, leaving a vacant space and him frantic. He woke in a quiet panic, relieved to find the walls surrounding and the bed beneath him, but immeasurably so to have his wife sleeping soundly next to him. Even though she had all but one of her limbs thrown out of the covers she still snugged against his frame, and while the bulk of his body protected hers, her hand was kept firmly rested over the expanse of her stomach, comforting their child as it rested. A smile settled on his face as he closed his eyes once more, placing his palm over Anna's, feeling the wonder for the hundredth time but being just as amazed as if it were the first.

A couple of small whimpers behind him, followed swiftly by the sound of utter joy and contentment, said that _yes, it was real._ Perfectly so.

John turned from his place standing upon the doorstep, with the same careful, slower than normal movements he had appropriated ever since their son came into the world. His gaze was drawn to the little face that poked from the swaddling of blankets, the sweet button nose and eyelids that faintly fluttered. He was a dream, and held his old fool of a father completely captivated.

Well, almost.

His breath held upon the crisp air as he took in Anna's expression, the smile that had not left her eyes as she smiled down at her newborn, her arms holding the boy with such fierce love as they had been crafted to do so. She was always indescribably beautiful, in shadow and in sunshine, but John swore that she had never been as radiant as she was now, as the mother of their child.

He smiled at them both, his cheeks aching. Such a fool he was, for now until the rest of his days.

Still, she had noticed the worry in his eyes, the faintest of clouds crossing over.

"He's fine," she assured him, her voice soft as she jostled the baby slightly in her embrace, causing him to gurgle contentedly. "He's just impatient to see his home."

John nodded, the glimmer of tears held safely back. While Anna glided her gloved finger into the opening of the blankets, delicately soothing their son's cheek as she cooed down at the tiny bundle, he made no hesitation in guiding the key into its lock, letting it give way with the familiarity he was used to, though this situation was nothing like familiar.

His heart swelled to know that all too soon it would be.

The arrival of Baby Bates had not gone the way they had planned for it, although in hindsight it seemed fitting that that should have been the case. They did not see in the New Year as both of them had expected to, sharing smiles and the old song of _Auld Lang Syne_ with the others in the hall, John standing behind the chair as Anna sat, both hands placed on her bump. Instead, their son had been in her arms as she lay exhausted and euphoric in the bed that belonged to her employer, and he had stretched out right beside her, amazed by the power of the love he felt for this little person he long imagined but had always known. Still amazed by the beauty and the bravery of his phenomenon of a wife, who he loved more than ever when he laid eyes upon her again, the same but forever changed. He fell deeper in love when she caught his gaze and said the words, with so much conviction despite the efforts of her endurance.

" _You have a son, Mr Bates."_

Surely, his pride and adoration had reached its peak. His lips brushed her forehead, damp and flushed with a sheen of sweat, and his arm circled her shoulders immediately as he greeted his boy, his own flesh and blood and his heart, for the first time.

He was so proud of her, all of his convictions that she was the strongest woman he had known come completely true.

And then she had reaffirmed their dream as the sweetest reality it had bloomed into, occupying their own world even with Lord and Lady Grantham, Lady Mary and Mr Talbot joining them.

" _We have a son, John."_

Their midnight and the many minutes afterwards were filled with smiles and laughter and more than a few kisses as they let themselves be happily lost, getting comfortably used to how it would be from now on.

They were no longer an army of two, as enduring and loving and complete as they had been.

They were a family of three.

The snow continued to fall throughout New Year's Day, leaving a soft blanket upon the grounds outside the Abbey. As beautiful as the scene looked, John hoped fervently that it would melt away swiftly. Lady Mary was kind and gracious, allowing Anna and all of them as much time as they needed. He bid her to rest – she needed it, with the surprise as much as all that she had done to get their son safely with them – but Anna insisted, and they moved themselves into one of the rooms onto the East wing before the sun set upon the first day of the year. Her embarrassment had faded, but not her sense of duty.

" _Lord knows when it will stop,"_ he huffed as the white flurries drifted against the window, sparks against the darkening of the dusk. " _I know we're lucky –_

" _Very lucky indeed,"_ she interrupted, smiling down at the sleeping baby nestled against her breast.

" _I would just like to have you both at home before next Christmas, at least. It would put my mind at rest."_

Anna's eyes met his own, and he was struck in the centre of his chest by how bright they were. It was as though they had been waiting for this very moment to shine truly again, and now he understood.

" _I don't think either of us will be able to rest much ever again,"_ she said with a small laugh, rocking her arms from side to side gently. _"But so long as he is happy and content, I don't mind."_

Their son was bundled up tight, the woollen shawl around him the same colour as the snow that settled outside but much, much warmer.

" _He'll know when he's there, of course,"_ she uttered as he came to join her on the bed, his cane rested against the swirled gold wallpaper. " _I think he'll be so excited that he won't want to sleep for days."_

A grin curved John's lips, one of his large fingers tracing the outline of the baby's cheek. He gave a little snuffle from inside of his cocoon, and they shared a near-silent laugh at their son's response to his father's presence.

" _Taking everything in, like the clever lad he is. He knew his name before we even gave it to him, I'm sure of it."_

He beamed with unashamed pride at that notion. Perhaps the many nights he had spent reading to Anna's bump had done something to help, but he was more certain that it was all down to nature and, more accurately, the most perfect nature of their little miracle.

Anna smiled and sighed, tearing her gaze away for a few moments to stare unreservedly at her husband.

" _I think we need to take advantage of this time, just while he's asleep and won't notice."_

John indicated his approval with a smile, leaning just enough not to cause a commotion to his slumbering son. Anna's lips were softer now, and he kissed her delicately at first, before his love and eternal thankfulness required a deeper display.

Their little boy made himself known once more, wriggling against the blanket within Anna's hold. Their kiss still on both of their lips, they smiled.

" _Okay, darling baby,"_ she crooned. _"We're here."_

" _And we love you,"_ John added, giving a soft smile to Anna before gazing back down, stroking the baby's cheek. _"More than we can ever find the words to say."_

The little one seemed perfectly fine after those assurances, stopping his squirming, but just to be sure, John placed a kiss on his small forehead.

" _There,"_ Anna's voice accompanied the action, letting the baby know he would never be without the devotion of both his mother and father. _"Nothing to fuss over."_

The weather turned at sunrise the next day, and the day after they decided it was time to go back to the cottage, Lord Grantham being as generous as to grant John a fortnight's leave, even teasing that he may need to train Tiaa to fetch his slippers and take care of other essentials if the pull of new fatherhood became too unbearable for his valet to leave behind each day. He gave Anna the time to bathe and dress into something other than one of Lady Mary's nightgowns, and took the baby down to the servants' hall, where he was promptly showered with attention from all directions. Anna had already insisted that he was heaven-sent, placid and hardly ever crying, except for when he was hungry.

John fretted that after spending the best part of his life only used to the two of them the amount of sudden new and strange faces would prove too much for his son, and cradled him carefully, ready to growl like an unsettled bear if anyone came too close. But he remained peaceful, not minding a bit when he was passed – with his father's look of gentle warning – from Mrs Hughes to Miss Baxter, and then back again when Daisy flustered and said she wouldn't know how to hold him, at least not for the time being. It seemed undoubted that he had inherited his mother's sociable nature, and John was happy for that. Even Thomas – or Mr Barrow, as they would have to get used to calling him from now – managed a smile, remarking that given how handsome the baby was it was just as well that he had taken after Anna. John exchanged a wry look with the new butler, thinking that he would need to do better if they were to continue with such amiable banter. No matter that she told him that the little one had the curve of his jaw or the image of his smile – _how could she possibly see that so soon?_ – all that John could see when he looked at his son was the entirety of the beauty his wife possessed, and it made him the happiest man on earth.

As if by some magic she arrived back amongst them all, her hair fastened in a bun that was far neater than the messy braid he had fashioned with his own well-meaning hands whilst hers were full elsewhere. She took the baby effortlessly back from Mrs Hughes's arms into her own once more, met with a chorus of coos, and John could see that their son, always happy, was more so now that he was back where he belonged again.

The elder Bates worried that it was still much too cold outside, wanting to shelter the younger from all the harshness of the world. Anna was too enamoured to call him a _silly beggar_ , but she kissed his cheek with a lingering before she fetched another blanket to keep their boy as snug as possible.

The car that Lord Grantham had arranged was waiting outside, and John nodded his thanks to the chauffeur while Anna shook her head that they had been given such a luxury – walking from the front door had been strange enough. Their son had no idea of the significance of it all, falling back to sleep in his mother's arms. The drive was leisurely enough to please John, but he bid the chauffeur to stop at the final pathway leading to the cottages – he had wanted just the three of them to make the last part of the journey on their own. Luckily, the snow had been cleared from a straight line upon the ground – perhaps they had Mr Chirk to thank for that – so his wish had been fulfilled, and with a hand at the small of Anna's back, he led his wife and son to the door of their home.

And now, here they were.

He was sure he had never been happier in his entire life. They had waited so long and so patiently, with more sorrow than they had expected. But now, neither of them could stop from smiling, walking through each room of the cottage with their son. Their dearest wish and their greatest gift.

"Out there is the garden, where you'll be able to play when you're a little bigger and it gets much warmer."

Anna's voice sounded uncannily like a lullaby as she spoke to the baby, who wriggled a little against his covers, craning his little head for a better view of everything. John held onto her waist, bringing the palm of his hand to smooth against the soft and fair baby hair on his son's head.

"And this is the front room. You'll always be as cosy as you like in here, because Pa will make the fire so lovely and warm for us. And we'll all sit here together until the moon tells us it's time to go, until the next day when we can do it all again."

John couldn't help but smile so fondly listening to her words, each one so full of love. It had been his dream since he had fallen in love with Anna to be a father, but it had been a _need_ for him to see her as a mother. His heart had continued to beat although it had been crushed when he believed it was something that simply wasn't possible for them; it had needed to beat for Anna, more than for himself. To have her face another cruelty – the worst of all – was more than he could bear, yet he had to resolve to stay strong for her. They were one person – he had always believed it, more with each trial that they faced – and they would go on, whatever happened.

They were still one, just with another heart joining with theirs.

"And when he's done with the fire, Pa can tell us a story..."

After being very alert from the moment they had stepped inside, the baby let out a wide yawn.

"We can save that for later," John remarked, hugging both arms around Anna's middle while she took the place soothing the little one.

"Too much excitement for one day," she replied, "Although I'm not sure how it can ever stop."

Both gazed down at their bundle of joy, safe and sounder than ever; home, at last.

"We'll have our moments," he said before brushing his lips at her cheek, nudging his nose against the lobe of her ear.

Abruptly, he found himself pushed aside.

"Excuse me," she gaped, the words slightly muffled from the residue of her own sizeable yawn.

John chuckled, kissing the top of her head while she laid her face against his chest, all the while keeping their son aloft.

"Later," he whispered in his own gentle lullaby, holding one of their baby's tiny feet in the centre of his palm, rubbing his other in small circles against her back. "We've got all the time we need to get comfortable."

They didn't need long at all.

* * *

He sat downstairs for as long as he possibly could, and still he knew it was too soon, but he had grown restless and wasn't able to concentrate for longer than to read one page of the book he had plucked from the shelf. It was impossible to think of or do anything else, knowing that Anna and their son were above. They were likely both asleep, but it didn't matter – he would sit in the chair by the little dresser, until one or both of them awoke. It sounded a little bit foolish, but he couldn't bear being apart from his family – not when they were so close by, and most certainly not on their first night at home together. One by one, he unlit the lamps and locked up for the night, taking on the guise of a mouse and quieting the heavy tread of his steps as he ascended the stairs.

A light glowed from the bedroom, beckoning him before he entered. Framed in candlelight, Anna stood in her stocking feet, peering into the crib that was not too far a distance from their bed. John was rather surprised, but couldn't tell her otherwise. He had fussed over her quite enough in the last few months, even when she wouldn't listen.

Besides, he was too much in love with the sight.

She let out the smallest gasp and quickly smiled when she accepted his hands about her waist, bringing them closer and moulding her back to his chest.

"I wish I didn't have to put him down," she confessed quietly in the hush and peace of the room. "I know it's so silly, but I miss him when I'm not holding him."

Their perfect son lay amidst the blankets in his crib – the one that covered him hand-knitted by Anna in the time that she felt assured enough to make something for the baby growing inside her, and he had taken to it quickly, chubby fists curled into it while his legs kicked out underneath. He must have been dreaming, already.

"Tell me I'm ridiculous, John."

"Never," he uttered, holding her tighter for his own necessity. "It's perfectly natural. And so are you."

She laughed faintly, rubbing her hand over his.

"I mean it," he reaffirmed. "Nobody has taken to being a mother so easily." He nuzzled against her cheek, tears of happiness in his eyes to think of everything. "It was meant for you."

She didn't answer for a while, though he thought he heard a whimper in her throat. Her fingers stroked against his skin, and when she sought them, he linked the both of theirs cleanly together.

While she had been resting at the Abbey the day before, he had braved the small blizzard to make the trip to the cottage and get everything ready. His leg ached more than it normally did, but he quickly forgot about any discomfort as he gathered the blankets and small clothes, preparing the crib and smiling as he placed the little rabbit toy at one of its corners. The same toy stood guard at their son's head now, while they watched from above, absolutely in awe and overwhelmed with yet more love.

It had been all they had asked for, and much more besides.

"He's precious," she finally said, and the sheer joy in her voice made John's heart sing.

"He is. As the next little Bates will be. And the one after that."

Anna craned her head to catch his eyes, a smirk upon her face.

"A step at a time, Mr Bates," she made the point to say, and he chuckled as he considered that he justly deserved his full title at that moment. "We should make the most of what we've got."

"Which is a lot," he added. "The whole world, in fact."

It wasn't the time to wonder, though the questions remained in both of their heads and hearts. She deserved to have all the children she wanted, and he longed to behold her with arms full and little ones running around her feet, keeping them both busy at every hour of the day. They could see Doctor Clarkson in a little while, or perhaps go straight to Doctor Ryder as he would know best. It seemed as though it would just be a question of taking some time and being careful, and John doubted that there was any other couple who knew better than they did about the need for that.

She let out a long sigh, suddenly. Concerned, John rested his chin upon her shoulder, hugging her closer.

"How am I ever going to go back to work? I told Lady Mary that I wanted to, and I want to give it a go, but if I behave like this..."

Feeling the weight of relief inside, John smiled, kissing her neck swiftly.

"That's another thing we'll take as it comes," he reassured her. "Given everything, Lady Mary would understand if you changed your mind. We have savings, and there'll still be my wage coming in."

She turned around in his arms, facing him with wide eyes.

"But I don't want you to miss anything either," she said earnestly, edging the fastened buttons of his shirt with the tips of her fingers. "There's so much to take in, and I can't deny you of any time with your son..."

He knew when to choose his moments. On cue, the baby woke up, letting out a sound that was a closer to a whine rather than a cry, confused as they weren't right nearby.

No time to fret.

John grinned as Anna gathered him from the crib, kissing the side of his head and swaying him gently in her arms.

"Let's just think of now," he said, holding them both. "Our first night here together. You don't want to miss too much of it, do you, son?"

They couldn't be sure, but he seemed to shake his little head in response to his father's voice, which made Anna laugh delightfully.

"I'm quite certain that he's a night owl," she replied. "My little love, you need to take after your father more."

"He's perfect as he is," John answered, making a start on unbuttoning his shirt and taking down his braces while Anna went back to the bed holding the baby. He undressed with haste, throwing on his pyjamas in a fashion, so that he could be back with them as soon as possible.

When he curled up beside them, Anna half-resting against his chest with their boy in her arms, he knew whatever dream was in store could wait, for a lifetime if necessary.

"Look, John," Anna exclaimed, tracing a finger at the baby's chin as he bobbed his head up, "he definitely has that from you."

* * *

Anna let out a small grumble, sensing her head upon the warm and familiar pillow. Sleeping in one of the grander rooms of the Abbey for a total of four nights in her whole life – three of them just recently passed - had been a luxury, and not one she had taken for granted, but nothing could compare to being at home, in her own bed. She could smell John's scent close to her – her favourite, along with the incomparable, indescribable baby-scent of their little boy that she was already addicted to – and if she didn't know better, she would imagine she was in some kind of paradise, with the pile of blankets that were covering her.

Before she opened her eyes, she could hear voices. Or rather, one voice – deep and just a touch hoarse, utterly unmistakable and soothing – accompanied in its pauses by a series of gurgles, differing in pitch and volume but all sounding very happy indeed.

She smiled against the pillow, a listener to the ongoing conversation. This was something she had dreamt for a while, but even in her half-asleep state she had the comfort and thrill of knowing that she was no longer in a land of her mind's own making.

A particularly bright shaft of sunlight fell upon her face, and her instincts kicked in with an alarming speed.

"John, John," she mumbled, imagining that she both sounded and looked like a fright. "Why didn't you wake me? Is he alright?"

"He's absolutely wonderful," her husband replied, as though he had stepped from a dream himself, his voice sentimental and his hair quite dishevelled. "You've barely slept more than a few hours since before he got here, and we were awake half the night with him. I didn't want to disturb you."

"I don't mind about that," she replied, sounding much more like a human now. John was walking closer but she still shifted herself up, heart aching to see her first glimpse of her sweet baby boy for the first time in daylight that morning, as well as to have a better view of her husband.

"We were just having a little chat, weren't we, son? Mainly about how beautiful and kind your Mama is, and how we're the luckiest two in the world to have her."

Anna shook her head, unable to say anything as she revelled in the sight that she always knew would make her heart soar. The days when she had resigned herself to never witnessing it, except in her wildest dreams, had happily faded, and the most wonderful memory of the first time John held their son would now always be with her. She found herself revisiting it too often throughout the minutes and hours, entering her head as she let herself succumb to her drowsiness, but every single time it made her smile wider and seemed all the sweeter.

His arms had trembled as they lay waiting to receive their longed-for and loved child into them, and as she glanced at him through tired but adoring eyes, she could feel his trepidation as much as his ecstasy.

" _Hopefully he won't cry,"_ he had uttered, voice thick with emotion. _"If I was him, I wouldn't want to leave your arms either."_

" _He can't wait to meet his Daddy properly,"_ she replied, her own words wavering. _"He knows you so well already. Look, he's reaching for you."_

Their baby had poked one of his arms up and out of the blanket that covered his little body, and Anna smiled down at him, overcome with the love that had possessed her.

She only loved one other person so much, and tears of pure joy came to her eyes as she handed their son over to his strong yet perfectly gentle embrace.

All the while, her eyes were entranced, watching the expression shift with nothing but love upon John's face. Father and son, together at last, after so much hoping, wishing and praying.

" _Hello, son."_

The baby's tiny fist flailed, before opening and catching hold of one of John's fingers. Anna felt so alive, so full of wonder at beholding her heart's deepest desire come true.

" _I love you so much."_

The tears sprang back now, outweighed by the smile that stretched over her lips. There was something even more powerful about seeing her husband hold their tiny child against his large, protective frame in the private surroundings of their home – in the very room where their union of love had brought him into being. She had long been fascinated by John's voice, listening to his words for her own pleasure, but hearing him speak to their little boy was a joy all of its own. She could be content for hours to be an observer, hanging on every word.

"Oh, now," he said in a hush as the baby began to squawk. "I think I know what you want. It is past breakfast, after all."

Anna smiled at the tenderness in John's tone, outstretching her arms once she had swiftly unfastened the ties holding up her nightgown.

"Come here, little love," she cooed.

No sooner had she settled him against her breast, their son latched on, his warm and soft head pressing to her. The sensation was one she was still getting accustomed to, but she loved it. Having their child so close, giving to him the care and love he needed. There would be a day when he wouldn't depend on them quite so much – not that she could begin to fathom it yet – but for now, they were his world, and Anna was unbelievably happy to give herself over.

She had craved a child for longer than she had been aware, lived to be able to give her husband a child. With their precious son in her arms, nursing him with all the love she held in her heart, she was truly fulfilled.

Her eyes lifted, and she smiled towards John, his gaze hazy with happiness towards the both of them. No doubt some men would excuse themselves while such an act was taking place, but he didn't want to miss anything, mesmerised by the scene in front of his eyes, amazement and softness deep within them.

The three of them together, whenever they could be. It was all she had wanted, and the reality was bettering the dream.

She adjusted the baby in her grasp, smiling as John came around to help her get her gown back into place. Her hands were quite full, as was their son.

"You should get some rest too," she said, turning to look up at him nestled beside her. "It was a two-person job last night."

John shook his head, not saying anything for a few moments, watching intently as their little one's eyes of bright blue blinked between open and shut.

"I'm fine," he affirmed. "The both of you are all the fuel I need."

She beamed, dipping her hand against the swaddling and stroking the softness of the baby's cheek as John's arm slid about her shoulders.

"I can't believe it," he uttered as his palm caressed her. "I knew it would be unlike anything else, but the love I feel for him...and yet I don't know how I haven't lived without it forever. It seems so natural."

"Hmmm," Anna nodded, feeling exactly the same. Her arms felt like they had always carried the weight of their son, and her heart certainly had.

An echo of a giggle left her as she let her fingertip very gently tap his button nose, and he made the tiniest, sweetest of sounds in response. He was theirs, and though at times it didn't seem real, it was, absolutely and completely.

"I love you," her husband's voice sounded against her ear, his words another familiarity that always lifted her to the level of heavens. "I always will, but now I love you even more. For being so strong. I always knew you could do this."

She could feel the tears glazing her eyes, the memories of what she had expected her life to be. A life with him, which would always have been the best life she could have known.

Their son wriggled in her embrace, his snuffling breaths as he dropped back into sleep yet more evidence; the signs of life she so cherished.

Their life had been made even better.

"I love you," she uttered, her eyes meeting his and their smiles doing the same. "You gave him to me, our son."

"There's no me without you," he answered. "We are one, remember. Including this little one."

Anna smiled brightly, and they both gazed down at him, sound asleep and kept safe by love. She shifted gently so that he wouldn't wake by the movement, letting John hold him at the same time.

"He'll soon be awake," she whispered when a few peaceful moments had passed. She found that she could hardly wait.

"He will," John replied, holding his arm tighter around her while his other cradled their boy. "And then we can have some more adventures. Can't we, William Bates?"

In his sleep, William jutted his little head up – something they both noticed was becoming a habit of his.

"So clever," John cooed as he noted their son's response. "Why are you smiling?"

Anna was in love with the look on her husband's face, which almost mirrored their child's completely.

"That's another thing he gets from you."

* * *

 **A/N: *happy sighs and tears***

 **There should be a couple more (canon!) Baby Bates stories in the pipeline :)**


End file.
